May 15th 2017 | Player With Union Jack Sticker On Helmet Has Not Played For GB

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Colin Freddo, a 26 year old wide receiver in Division One, has began wearing a Union Jack flag on his helmet despite never being involved with the GB Lions in any capacity whatsoever.

After being accused of intentionally misleading his teammates, Freddo was surrounded by an angry mob before he convinced them it was “just like the NFL players with the American flag”.

Teammate and linebacker Trey Braithwate said “He’s not even good. But even that wouldn’t justify it.”

Swag scientists at the University of Dudley have confirmed that wearing unearned helmet stickers is amongst the gravest of crimes against football fashion, and should be punished by having one finger broken for each violation.

 

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