– Distributors cannot keep up with demand for DVDs of the Ipswich Cardinals 6-0 victory over the East Essex Sabres.
– London Warriors forget they had a game this week, and only turned up at half time. Final result, London Warriors 57-21 Bury Saints.
– 4,000 people vow never to watch American Football ever again after watching the Newcastle Vikings take a 3-0 victory over the Yorkshire Rams at the John Charles Centre.
– Oxford Saints’ new uniform somehow fails to stop them falling 35-8 to the Sussex Thunder.
– Hertfordshire Cheetahs showing just how bad Division Two actually is.
– Leicester Falcons to lower asking price for Coventry Jets players as they fall to 71-0 defeat to the Sandwell Steelers.
So, with four games finishing with 14 points or less, a team losing 71-0 and the London Warriors mopping the floor with some of their closest competition, we give Week 2 a whopping 4 Russ Hewitts out of 5.
A recent study has confirmed that around 75 percent of footballers in Britain do not believe in the existence of a football team in Torbay.
“For one, I don’t even believe Torbay is a real place” said Warren Scale, defensive tackle for the Sussex Thunder. “I’ve never seen anything that gives any indication they are a real team”.
Blake Farquarht, quarterback of the Kent Exiles said “I can only assume this is some sort of tax write off for BAFA. Why else would such a ridiculous team exist? I’ve never played them, and I don’t think anybody else has either.”
“There is something BAFA aren’t telling us. This goes deeper. I’m wondering whether the SFC II West even exists at all.”
Sussex Thunder center Dave Thompson has told Daily Britball he is going to share “every single highlight I can get my hands on.”
Despite knowing every one of his team mates is watching Red Zone, he is determined to clog up their news feeds with highlight clips produced by NFL, NFL UK, NFL.com and NFL Memes.
“I just desperately need to get across to my teammates that I watch the NFL, and that I understand what’s going on” Thompson told us.
“I know they’ve already seen them live, but I’m going to do it anyway.” confirmed Thompson.